Thursday, January 9, 2014

The Death of a Loved One

 Sometimes we’re forced to stop and view the world from a whole new perspective, taking us even deeper in our experience of life than we ever experienced before.  A sudden and unexpected death of a loved one wipes away all the pettiness we are concerned with during ordinary life.

January 9 is the birthday of my wife for 23 years—until karma pulled us in different directions—and the mother of our 3 amazing children, Jnani, Shane, and Sara—our 18-year-old daughter.  A few days earlier, however, this woman many of you knew as Kanti, and some of you knew as Nadine Kennedy, left her body and this world after a long battle with illness.

Kanti and I remained close friends all the way to the end.  I know she was concerned about the children being without her, and would they have everything that they needed.  Her entire life was about the well-being of our children, and she was a very loving and caring mother.  The great thing now is the many exceptional qualities she passed to our children simply through being such an excellent example.

I think everyone in our family quietly assumed I would one day be the first to go, and the mother would be around for quite a while longer to be her usual responsible self, taking care of all the necessary details.  So it adds to the shock of her passing that she was the first to go. 

And I ask myself, can I, at 68, have the strength and the wisdom to be the only living parent for our children?  They are the best children anyone could hope for, and I pray that the best I have to give them is enough.  Kay has always been a wonderful step-mother, as she has known them all their lives, and she has always been part of our family anyway.  I know that together we will make sure the children always have a strong sense of family and home—which they are more and more developing among themselves as young adults.  I know they will always enjoy a blissful life, even amongst the many karmic challenges we all face from time to time.

I wanted to post this on January 9 in honor of Kanti and all that she gave the world.  She helped many people over the years, and was always the effervescent light—which is the literal meaning of her name.  For all of us who knew her, she will live on in our hearts.

I would like to share some Q&A exchanges that have come in:

 “Sometimes when we're hurting or—and maybe especially—when we see someone suffering, it is very hard to think of it all as a game.  Part of the pain of compassion comes from the very recognition of what I see ‘out there’”

Compassion is primarily developed through experiencing the poignancy of life, whether our own or another's or others'.  For example, the recent death of my children’s mother is extremely poignant.  My children are great people.  Logically, they don’t deserve anything like this.  Yet it is their karma.  Though coming into harmony with the poignancy, great compassion is developed that will make them even greater people throughout their lifetimes.

Someone sent me this great quote:  "Grief and sorrow are natural at certain tragic moments in life.  We need to find ways to pass it through the heart as we learn to accept and live with what has happened.  The heart must be allowed to breathe whatever feelings arise in it from loss.  Anger, fear and grief are natural companions to loss.  However we also have to be careful not to cling to them or the pain.  If we brood too long we risk the heart freezing in time, shutting down and turning to debilitating despair.  In time sorrow will become compassion, acceptance and forgiveness.  And, we become more empathetic to the suffering of others." ~Devi Ma

When we understand the poignancy of life in ourselves, then it is much easier to understand and empathize with anyone's pain or suffering on any level.  And it is very good to see it all as the poignancy of life.  It is the best perspective and the highest understanding.  Otherwise the suffering inherent in this world makes no sense.

Someone sent me this message:  Your most recent message (on Facebook) about Kanti's passing brought tears to my eyes.  It would be so easy to sublimate one's complicated feelings of loss and grief within a context of philosophy and beliefs, but you have given expression to those feelings of grief which have validity and a right to be expressed.  I love the words you have chosen to express your courage and determination to steer your children through their course of life.  I lost my husband in an accident 6 months ago.  My parental duty has been uppermost in my mind amidst the shock and the grief.  I admire your vow.  I am sure you are taking comfort in the outpouring of love from all those around you.

My wife Kay looked at Kanti’s previous lesson and her current lesson.  In her previous lesson it was written:  “Any one of us who reads this could be nearing the conclusion of this particular incarnation, so if you read something here like ‘we’ll explore this more deeply later in the Course,’ please know that when your time comes for the Grand Transition and you leave behind the earthly limitations, you will have already received everything from the Course that you could ever need.  Remember, the lessons correspond to exactly what you need at the time.  When the time for the transition comes from this world to the next, you will be more than ready, and will understand and flow with what is actually happening, well-prepared to make the best of the adjustment.”

And her most current lesson during the time of her passing said:  “To onlookers in the physical realm it appears as though ‘death’ has occurred.  In reality, however, no one has ever yet died.  There was merely a transition from the physical, as seen by physical eyes, to the subtle, unseen by physical eyes.  The body then returns to the elements of the Earth, from which it was formed and of which it was composed.  As we meditate on formlessness, we begin to expand.  If we are not contained (thus limited) by the form of this body, we expand endlessly.  When the balloon pops, what happens to the air?  Does it die?  No, it simply merges into the air all around it.  It goes from being limited to being Infinite.  In the same way, if the attention goes beyond the limited form of this body, we merge into the same Consciousness that pervades and permeates the entire Universe.  Yet it is all right here, right now.”

If the ONE is everything, then "who" is purifying the ego?  Is not the ego an aspect of the Self?  The Self constricts into the ego though remains the Self - no?  I was raised Catholic and we're always reminded we come into this world with "Original Sin."  Is this the same as karma?  I would love your wisdom on this please.”

This is a very great question. It shows you are doing true contemplation.

You are right, 'The Self constricts into the ego though remains the Self.'  There is nothing at all except the one Self.  However, the Self, being innately playful—like puppies, kittens, and young children before they are made serious by society—plays a game with Itself, which is to forget Itself and to think of itself as all these particular individuals.

So there is actually no one to either have an ego or to purify the ego.  It all simply happens in the game the Self plays for its own enjoyment.

The Self forgets Itself for the pure joy of remembering the Truth once again.

Karma is NOT the same as 'Original Sin.'  There is no such thing as 'original sin.'  The only sin is the consciousness of sin.  We come into this world with Original Purity or Original Divinity, which is soon hypnotized by the world around it, causing us to forget our true and eternally changeless Nature.  And the Game goes on.

"The challenge I face is truly seeing & understanding what is to be learned."

Usually what is needed to be learned is right in front of us.  It could be very subtle, or it could stick out like a sore thumb.  It cannot be figured out by the mind, but it is intuitively obvious whenever the knowledge is needed.  The mind cannot come up with a solution, but if we open up to what is needed, it will arise as an insight from within.

I suggest you stop defining your life as being stuck in an unhappy work situation. From your comments, it is obvious that you are only make half-hearted efforts, if that, toward being positive and seeing your life with an uplifting vision.  As it is, you are simply allowing your habitual negative thoughts to take over, without even realizing what is happening.  And then you are no longer in control of your life.  You habitually recreate unhappy work situations.  Please remember that your vision of the world and your life determines your experience of the world and your life.  We think vision follows the fact, but the truth is that our vision creates the fact.

Describe your life and your prospective future in much more positive and lighthearted ways, and you will be amazed at how everything else changes as well.

“I have recently come upon your blog while browsing the web.  I find I can't stop myself reading your posts!  I am a little confused on exactly what your course goal is?  What exactly do people that go through the course achieve from it?  Is it to get in touch with ones spirituality?  I have always been interested in as you put it 'spiritual evolution'.  In a strange way I feel this is something I have really been looking for.”

This is wonderful.  There is a true opening and readiness.  The reason it feels you can't 'stop yourself' from reading the posts is because of the spiritual energy they transmit to the reader.  This is why there are people who have taken various versions of the Course since the 70's.  They've read so many lessons for so many years, yet still they are excited to get their next new lesson.  It is because of the Energy in them, which is quite palpable.

The goal of the Course is to live in the Truth of the Present Moment.  Most people have memories of their past leading up to the previous moment, and then they conveniently skip over the present moment and go right into projecting what the future will hold.  Living with the attention focused in the past and the future, we miss out on our actual life, which is always taking place in the present moment, and ONLY in the present moment.

Once we get somewhat established in the present moment, the next step is to be established in the TRUTH of the present moment.  We can be in the present moment and focused on our backache or headache, or on any of many emotions we are vulnerable to, such as worry, fear, anxiety, agitation, and so forth.  We can also be in the present while being obsessed with some thought, or some structure or patterns of thought that we can give meaning to.  All these things are temporary and passing show.  They are relative truths, but not the absolute Truth.

The TRUTH of the present moment is always the Same, and does not fluctuate or change in any way.  It is an exalted state of well-being.  Some people refer to the same experience as Love. There is no real difference between Love and Truth.

All you have to do is read two 10-page lessons a month, and apply the principles presented in your own daily life to whatever degree is possible.  With practice, more and more is possible.

In the process of the Course you will come in contact with your own true Self, which lives within you as Subjective Consciousness.  Through the lessons we come to understand and experience the Truth of that state, and learn to live in the state of the Self, which is very blissful.

Yes, it is something you have been looking for, whether you realize it or not.  Everyone looks for it sooner or later, and often we don't even realize that we're looking until what we are looking for is actually found.

My wife Kay, who helps me produce the lessons, has already sent you Lesson 1 and some info about the Course, and you will receive Lesson 2 in a couple of weeks.  Anyone interested in the Course can receive the first month as an introduction to the Course simply by stating their interest in it.
Thank you for your refreshing questions and attitude.  My guess is that you will indeed find the lessons to be just what you are looking for.

For information about the Course of Training written by D. R. Butler and the first month of the Course, write to

The Course is also available in Spanish and French.

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Ghayas said...

Thank You, dear Ram, for these loving words honouring the memory of Kanti. It feels so good to stay connected to the "Voice" of the Course during times like this. Thank You for making it audible. Great Love to you and all your dear ones. Ghayas

momoso said...

I woke up this morning and came to my computer looking for a little solace and found this blog. I took the course for over a decade, joined you in workshops, laughed with you and Kanti and now and just rediscovered the comforting rhythm of your words as they bounce from the page to my eyes and enter my heart like a warm drink of tea. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Divya said...

I was moved by your sharing of the passing of Kanti. Loved the sharing of the lesson she was on. It is true for me too that the current lesson seems to be what I am experiencing in the moment. This is why I continue to read them after all these years. I too, have experienced many deaths over the years and I am finding that I am coming out of the grief much sooner than I have in the past. Loved the quote about that.

My thoughts create my life from the time I wake up in the morning. I now notice them and am able to change them to thoughts that feel good. This takes a constant effort and the course has continually reminded me of this. Something from my current lesson comes up for me here and that is that "I may be living the life of my dreams and not even know it!" I contemplated that and found it to be true. Letting go of worry this morning as I sat down to meditate. In the end, my dear friend who passed six months ago taught me that everything works out perfectly.

I am grateful for your realness D.R. I appreciate that so much. It speaks to my heart. Blessings to you and Kay and your family.

Santiago Gafas Lunettes said...

Ram: How many good things you share on this post!: the excerpt about our being more than ready at death time, as prepared by the Course (you once told something similar, at your time of moving, that we students should not consider that all those years of participating in it were not a force at work inside us). Also, the Self becomes all of this by fun: I guess there is a meditation to be had in looking at all these personalities at variance with one another, and repeating: "We became them by fun from the One we really are". And: I am sure you will remain a fantastic father to the end.

Nikki Abbadessa said...

Ram, I am more grateful for the course and your presence in my life than ever before. This was an important post.
Although I did not know Kanti well, she touched my life in a sweet way and her death has had a profound impact. I am still contemplating this...
The preciousness of one single life. How a birth and death can actually transform others.
Since Kanti' passing I have felt a deep sadness and moments of exquisite joy. The joy has been in simple moments of daily life. In the present moment. My outer circumstances have not changed. I still have to figure out how to pay for my kids braces but I actually feel joy in that where only a few weeks ago I felt anxiety.
Her passing has had a visceral effect, not an intellectual one. I find myself grateful for my 'problems'. I have another day in this body. Another day to experience the Truth...
Poignant is right.
I find myself thinking of your love for your children and how they are doing..and wondering about you..the paradox of truly knowing death is not the end and still mourning for a great and profound loss.
It was also helpful to read about the Self playing with itself. Thinking of the ego as an aspect of the self is almost funny...I hope I can remember that!
Love to you dear Ram.
Nikki A.

D. R. Butler said...

I was considerably more 'personal' in this current entry, whereas I most naturally write from an impersonal perspective. This truly allows people to know what is going on in my life right now.

Once the Guru said, 'Ram shares everything in his outer life, and he shares everything in his inner life as well.'

Jimena Marquez said...

Thank You Ram for this touching entry, reminding us to allow ourselves to be touched by the poignancy of life...

Purnima Orlandi said...

It's truly amazing that Kanti's lesson's were completely in correspondence with her situation.
It never ceases to amaze me the clarity of Grace, how Grace is with us every step of the way, we need only to be open to it.
Blessings to Ram, Kay, Shane, Jnani and Sara.

Dave Silverstein said...

Ram, I so appreciate this particular 'blog', as it reonates quite deeply in my heart. When my Mom was dying of Cancer several years ago she told my Dad that , "I always thought YOU would be the one to go first". There is a certain poignancy to that statement....Our egos always trying to 'figure' it all out, control outcomes.

The passing of Kanti brought up a lot of 'grief' for me, personal but almost a'universal' kind of sadness etched into my heart....Yet, the longer I read my lessons the more I become nourished and grounded in the idea of this 'benevolent energy' that is such a loving prescense filled with divine love. Trusting in that feeling gives me personal strength.

I offer my loving prayers and blessings to dear Kanti and your beautiful family.

Bill Berry said...

I like describing my thoughts, but sometimes like now I just feel things and description seems silly. These words in your blog post resonate in big ways with my sense of "how it all is". I've always had a sense on universal connectedness but now after time with the course I understand it better. And rather than just thinking about things, I can use my awareness very tangibly in the (mundane!) world during good times and bad. Whether I'm mowing my lawn or dealing with a tragedy. I don't care if my description makes sense. Smiling in NH!

Vickie said...

"If the One is in everything then who is the ego?".....Recently walking in a winter garden I was struck by the profound enjoyment of my own perfect contentment. As such, I later contemplated its elements--the peace, the loveliness, the quietude, the shared company--a pervading sense of fullness and Oneness. Yesterday I was struggling with some challenging circumstances and experiencing an almost suffocating senses of lack. This morning I looked at them both--appearances of fullness and lack. I was reminded once again of the old adage--whether the cup is half full or half empty and my knowing that the Truth is it is ALWAYS exactly half. Attempting to stay in that balance point of awareness I remembered the garden...and realized the cup is always in Truth, in the Garden. Remembering the Garden, it was so easy to witness the cup. And so--how much time do I spend identified with the cup, trying to fill it, struggling against its empty spaces...and how much time do I spend in remembrance of the Garden, knowing what surrounds and protects and permeates my own small cup, trusting the appearances of fullness and lack to come and go. And re reading your offerings I knew completely--while the cup known as Kanti may have finished her karma, her love as Mother and Self is only stronger and very much alive in the Garden. with love,

James Donohue said...

Thank you for this blog entry. I got a course letter from Kanti in 1987. She asked me to roll the idea around in my head that I was the Self. Still good advice. Recently I had an astrological reading with her. I was taken by her compassionate and caring style. I would see her from time to time while doing seva. She would be orienting new people. The other day had a inner awareness that she is now in a state akin to what we see on a enlightened yogi's face. May the sunshine bring you and your family sweet memories of her.

Bettina said...

First question regarding prayers for others: I know that our thoughts create our reality and we can support others by maintaining our own great state. How could prayer for somebody else influence their health/ karma, if we are all responsible for our own thoughts & actions, as well as experiencing our prarabdha karma at the same time?

If a person has the karma to go through an illness and feels like born anew after having gone through it all, it had to be like that. If somebody dies in the meantime, probably any prayers from others for healing in this body wouldn't have helped, for the karma was up and it was the persons path to go though it and give up the body.

It is my feeling, that the only worthwhile thing to pray for regarding others is that they may be able to connect or deepen their connection with their higher Self in the process and be open for the transformation at hand, no matter what kind of it might be - how are we to know...

My second question is regarding our own attitude regarding the healing process for ourselves, if we were sick: Is someone getting a different result in the healing process by really being positive about the outcome and truly wanting to live - versus someone going into victim mode and loosing his/her energy even more by choosing this attitude? In other words: What has more power: Karma or the inner attitude?

Third question: What role does karma play in their attitude, consisting of thoughts and feelings? In other words: does Karma influence the way we think - possibly through our samskaras?

Forth question: Which attitude is more mature: through visualization and feeling creating a healthy reality OR being at peace with the situation at hand and knowing all is perfect, handing the outcome over to the Divine - no matter what the outcome was? -- I really long for some clarity!

D. R. Butler said...

Bettina, you really go for the heart of the matter, don't you? You are right in that we do not have to power to change or cause another person's karma. In the same way, no other can possibly cause anything to happen to us that is not already our karma to experience. They are simply the channel it manifests through. Someone had to do it. Thinking about it too much is mind-boggling, so I can only suppose that some magnificent Cosmic Computer arranges everything in perfect balance and harmony so that everyone only experiences their own karma and nothing else. This is very important to understand.

The only true form of prayer is affirmation. Since we are basically praying to our own inner Self, why 'ask' of something when it is much more powerful to actually 'affirm' its reality? There is no one else out there to ask anything of.

You said the most you might pray for another "is that they may be able to connect or deepen their connection with their higher Self in the process and be open for the transformation at hand."

This is a good start, but it's not quite what works. The way to generate affirmative energy is to 'know' that it is 'already' real or true. So your 'prayer' is much more powerful if you say 'that they ARE able to connect or deepen their connection...' You are affirming that it is already real, which generates the power to create.

This generated energy, especially in mass or by a large group, has the power to make things a lot better, even though it is impossible to change another person's karma. For example, if it was a person's karma to leave the physical body at a certain time, you could not change that, but your positive energy and affirmations could possibly help her enjoy a more positive and pleasant experience of the process. We cannot change another's karma, but we do have the power to comfort another's fear and to sooth their suffering.

This is because our inner experience is not determined by karma. It is determined either by habitual patterns of thinking and feeling, or by our applying our free will to experience the same situation in a more positive and pleasant way--free from the influence of habitual patterns. We learn how to do this through the lessons of the Course.

I'll pause here and take up question 2 (of 4) shortly. I just have to take a breath and shake my mind clear.

D. R. Butler said...

Onward to Question #2. Bettina is a very respected yoga teacher in Zurich, Switzerland, and she already has very good understanding. She sensed that she could refine her understanding through participating in the Course, and her questions are always delightful.

#2 is "Is someone getting a different result in the healing process by really being positive about the outcome and truly wanting to live - versus someone going into victim mode and loosing his/her energy even more by choosing this attitude? In other words: What has more power: Karma or the inner attitude?"

Karma determines the situations we find ourselves in, like props on a stage, but it is our inner attitude that determines how we will 'experience' that karma. If a person is sick, they will definitely enjoy a higher quality of life if they approach it with a positive attitude than if they are down in the dumps. Of course, the person down in the dumps never realizes there is an option or that he has any choice in the matter.

It is just as easy to feel good as it is to feel bad. If we feel otherwise, it is because of the power of our habitual patterns. Breaking free from habitual patterns is easily possible IF we know how.

D. R. Butler said...

"Third question: What role does karma play in their attitude, consisting of thoughts and feelings? In other words: does Karma influence the way we think - possibly through our samskaras?"

This question is subtle and complex and the answer can easily be yes or no. Ultimately, our thoughts and feelings, along with actions and words, create the karma that we as an individual will experience, either in this lifetime or another.

If, however, instead of creating from inside out, we allow ourselves to automatically 'react'
to our current karma, from outside in, that reaction in turn creates its own corresponding karma, and so on. In this you see why it is often referred to as the 'wheel of karma', going round and round, repeating itself endlessly, until we finally 'wake up' and determine to do it differently, producing different consequences or results.

So it is possible for our thoughts and feelings to be determined by karma, but it is much better if our thoughts and feelings create the karma, as this way we do it consciously instead of unconsciously.

Ultimately, it is better to be free from karma altogether. There is no real difference between 'good' karma and 'bad' karma. Karma is karma. It is karma itself that we must one day go beyond. Then we simply enjoy watching the karmic movie wind down until its finished.

D. R. Butler said...

And now the fourth question: "Which attitude is more mature: through visualization and feeling creating a healthy reality OR being at peace with the situation at hand and knowing all is perfect, handing the outcome over to the Divine - no matter what the outcome is?"

This depends on our state, which determines what is possible. If we can, the more mature attitude is to remain cheerful (or content) with what comes unsought. This is handing the outcome over to the Divine, which is, being all-powerful, is in control anyway.

If, however, we are determined to think, since our thoughts determine our reality, our experience, and our vision, then we might as well think the highest, more pleasant thoughts possible, so as to create better conditions and experiences in our personal life.

Ultimately, if we do what is necessary for transformation, we go beyond thoughts altogether, and learn to live in the space between thoughts, it is most blissful and free to 'let go and let God.' Something much more powerful and all-knowing that our little mind is available to guide us through life, so why not realize it always knows best and all we have to do is turn everything over to the Divine Presence that pulsates as the cosmos.

"Seek first the Kingdom of Heaven (the Subjective world within), and all these things (whatever is best for you,) will be given onto you."

Anonymous said...

I am just into year 3 of your wonderful course and am so grateful to have it. I am extremely disabled, in constant pain, I live alone, am facing major spinal surgery and feeling a lot of fear over many aspects of my life. I am finding it impossible to mostly, let alone consistently, visualise my life as I would like it to be, or feel the feeling of contentment. Knowing my thoughts and feelings are creating even more unwanted karma is adding to the fear.

My current lesson says the universe continuously gives us opportunities to grow and break free, and i feel this is strongly the case now. I practise gratitude as much as I can. I want to break free from as many samskaras as possible in this lifetime, as the idea of another incarnation like this one is terrifying. It took 58 years to find your course and begin spiritual work, I might not have access to it next time round! My feelings are lifting just writing this and I am almost laughing.

My question is, will I definitely have access to suitable teachings and guidance in my next incarnation? Please can you help me be less fearful of the consequences of dying before i have been able to break free from the samskara of fear? For example, will i have to live another life of abuse and fear? When i transition, will i be with the same souls who caused me harm in this lifetime? Or will i be in a different vibrational realm to them because i am working on sadhana? I am not bitter, i do not blame or hate, i just still feel fear.

Love to everyone who contributes here.
J in the uk

Vandita said...

Bettina, thank you for such great questions, and Ram, thank you for your wonderful answers. I loved your last sentence "Seek first…" You opened a new meaning for me. Thanks.

D. R. Butler said...

J in the UK, I hear you. The opposite of fear is love. When you learn to love what you fear, you will be free from fear.

Perhaps you will be happy to hear that in each incarnation we take up where we left off in the last one, as far as spiritual development is concerned. Everything we gain here, in consciousness, we take with us, and carry into our next incarnation. We will be provided with parents, friends, and an environment according to our state at the end of this life.

You will not have to repeat the karma of this lifetime. That is why you went through this lifetime. You wanted to work off some very hard karma, and you made it all the way through to your second Saturn Return, which indicates you are somewhat entering an entirely new life. Every 29 years or so our lives change in ways that almost seems like another incarnation.

So create now what you want and consider it already real. Know that you will only experience your true nature--Existence, Consciousness, and Bliss--Satchitananda. During the rest of this lifetime you will go through a process of great purification, which is one aspect of preparing you for your next incarnation, in which you can enjoy the fruits of this one.

Avivit said...

J in the U.K. I just wanted to tell you how your sharing touched my heart deeply and I send all the Love in my Heart and Light to you. May your experience be full of goodness all the way back HOME.

Avivit said...

Bettina, thank you for so many fantastic questions! which received so fantastic answers.

Although I prefer handing it all to the Divine as it is simply and clearly more restful....I also like to "practice" envisioning and intending being a profiscient creator.

Thank you Ram....thank you all for so much beautiful sharings here....what an exquisite place to visit!

Vandita said...

J in the UK, so touched by your share. May healing light and love be poured abundantly onto you.

A person that I know once lost her mind and was put into a mental facility. I met her right after she was sent home, and still had 'that look in her eyes'. A couple of years later she was totally recovered.

Once, she explained to me that when she was within the mental facility she knew she had no control whatsoever over her sick mind, she knew that she was so ill and felt so lost. One morning, she was siting with a group of other interns doing some paintings, and this young girl was sitting next to her cying and crying. She asked her what was going on, and the girl said: “I feel so lonely”. Then, this person took the girl´s hand and said to her: “Do not worry, I am here with you”. And she said to me: “I learnt so much from that experience. Because in this lifetime you can lose your house, you can lose your husband, parents, and family. You can lose your money. You can even lose your mind. But there is something that you can never lose: your capacity to love”.

This is something that I could state as the main thing that I have learnt from Ram and from taking his Course over the years. Love is truly the most available experience in life, and the most independent too.

May you be filled with tremendous love. Many blessings, J.

J in the UK said...

Avivit, thank you for your beautiful message. Your words are truly comforting.
J in the UK

Sarah said...

I have been reading this blog for almost 3 years, as well as a being a course member for the same.

This particular month the blog and all of the comments leave me without words. The Bliss of being a part of this energetic field of Beings is the greatest gift I could have hoped for in this lifetime. Whatever work was done in my previous lifetime is certainly paying off now.

Thank you Ram, Ghayas, momoso, Santiago, Nikki,Jimena, Purnima, Bill, Vickie, James,Bettina,Vandita,Avivit, J in the UK. and Annoymous for the Blessings your postings have given me.


Mary said...

J in the UK,
I also am very touched by your sharing and hope that D R's words and those of others here bring you much consolation and serenity even in the midst of your present challenges. Your grace full Self shines through.

Jean said...

J in the UK and Bettina, I am grateful for your questions and for your answers and comments, Ram. Mostly I am speechless, so deeply moved by the continuous flow of energy from this Source, the Lessons and this blog, after 30 something years. Such great karma! I can't imagine my life with out this.
J, I send you love and a warm hug.
Ram, as always I send you love and gratitude for being this channel of such blessing.

J in the UK said...

Thank you everyone for your replies. You have no idea how much your words have helped. I now feel cared for and supported as never before, and more able to face whatever lies ahead. My thinking and feeling have been uplifted. THANK YOU.
Ram, your reply is revealing more each time I read it, and I am so grateful to you.
Sorry for not thanking people individually, but I am finding it difficult to prove I'm not a robot and some messages would not send!
Love and gratitude to you all.
J in the UK

Sylvia from Colorado said...

Thank you again and again to all those write here. The comments and questions are perfect for what I need to hear/contemplate. As some of you know, I have been recovering from an auto accident since July. It totaled my Chevy Blazer, and, thank Heavens, my body incurred as little damage as one can have it seems. Strangely enough (to me), it was caused by a mini-seizure, which I've never had before in this life. Anyway, this is all leading to how, when reading this blog, your comments, questions and Ram's answers helped me. I am grateful for each of you, although I DO experience more and more that I am thanking the ONE consciousness in/as us all. May the pure, comforting white light of Consciousness surround our sweet Kanti and all her loved ones, including Ram and Kay. Loving blessings to all as the ONE. Sylvia

Mark said...

Vandita, thank you for your sharing, that is really a beautiful thought: no matter what happens, you don't lose your capacity to love. I suppose everything else is maya, and it comes and it goes. I am going through a lot of change right now. I may be losing my house, my wife, and my life is transforming a great deal. My wife has very much changed as well. Her mind, and her way of being has changed, and as far as I can tell she probably has some kind of a mental illness, that came on quite all of a sudden - she was admitted briefly to the hospital twice. At this point she does not see that she has a problem though, so there really isn't much that I can do, I can't force her to get help or treatment, except under very extreme conditions. More and more I realize that this is not my duty, and that I must allow her to go through her experience, and I must take care of myself. It is hard to adapt to the changes, and also to accept and allow her to go though what she needs to go through. I feel somehow like I am failing her if I don't find some way of tricking her into getting help, to not judge her change as bad, and possibly harmful to her. And it is true that in spite of all that has changed in her, she still emits a very pure love to people.

all you need in love, as the beetles say! I'm going to change my focus to love as much as I can. I'm sure emotions will still arise, but I am going to focus on love in the background when I remember to do so.

Vandita said...

Mark, thank you for your share too. I cannot imagine how hard it must be "to accept and allow her to go though what she needs to go through". So much detachment and love there. And freedom.

Such an important thing to learn to do myself. Your comment came just in perfect timing, as a perfect answer to a present life situation.

I really love the synchronicity of events all around this course and around us, students.

Karen Jo Shapiro said...

This is what came up for me today inspired by my new lesson (just starting Vol. 3, new section "The Art of Flowing".)

I've heard the old "Would you rather be right or happy" in regard to conflicts especially with our closest ones, like spouses. But I realized today that this old nugget hasn't really worked well for me…. because the ego thinks it WILL be happy if it is right.

The inner voice said instead, "Would you rather be right or Free"? Now THIS I can get on board with. Something inside me wants freedom so very much. Of course part of me gets I am already free if only I know it but there is something I need to be free of to know that fully!

I WOULD rather be free than right. Now to put it into practice….

Blessings to all in the community!
Karen Jo (KJ)

Bettina Keller said...

Over and over I'm amazed about the power of words that comes through the blog entries, people's comments and even more through the course. Also I feel so incredibly grateful for D.R.'s generosity of dedicating so much of his time to answer all of our questions that arise on the path of life, doing sadhana. He is not doing it for money, but because it is his hearts calling – what a huge service. There are not many places where you can get such high quality answers just like that in your own home. - What can we give back? Probably D.R. would answer: Apply the principles it in your life...

I just had this experience regarding getting some answers from D.R. in the last month's blog, when I asked 4 related questions, that I was carrying around with me for quite some time. D.R.'s answers were like a lesson in itself, for I felt ALL of him so present in bringing it to the point - it was like a flood of wisdom being poured onto me, and still in a very digestable way. Something within us knows and therefore understands. In this way I experience very often an inner YES, reading the words, along with some relief inside: „This is how it is.“ I guess these are the moments of aligning with the Truth, when a sublte correction of undestanding has happened. Therefore the course has become a lighthouse on my path - I wouldn't want to live without it anymore, for life has just become so much richer. Everything that happened in the past starts to make even more sense. Also the present feels much lighter and the future is lit with faith that all's well, that we are taken care of. Everything that doesn't feel along these lines I can take as a content for looking at it more closely with the help of the course principles. Sometimes just reading two pages lifts the mood or expands the experience of a situation. Slowly, being now in the third year of the course, I see the truth of D.R.'s words to just read the course, for all questions will be answered in the process. I admit, I feel attached to the course, however, it's probably one of the best attachments that you could have.

So much love to all of you who partake in this journey, and to you D.R. and Kay a great Thank You beyond words.

Anonymous said...

I read your recent fb comment and it so applies to me! I was wondering if you could speak about self trust? I have made some poor decisions of late and have another big one coming up in a few months. I want to make it with clarity and as much assurance as possible that it is best for everyone. I have a lot of self doubt now and my ability to make decisions after making such a mess of things. I feel so unsure of myself on every level and would like to live in the truth but am not sure what that is for me anymore. Maybe some others can relate to this in the blog?